I got my VCE study scores today. 38 in biology and methods and …29 in physics. ahaha which is fair enough, I knew I was destined to do terribly in physics from the first month into the year. but I’m quite disappointed in what I got in bio and methods. I mean its not terrible and it was what I was expecting (perhaps even better than what i was expecting, I was so sure I screwed up all my exams) but I’m just a bit annoyed because I know I can do better in both if I didn’t stress out so much before exams, and perhaps deep down inside I was holding onto a string of hope to still make it over 40 in both. I’ve decided to drop psych next year and retake methods because although 38 is pretty alright and it’ll get scaled a far bit, I really do believe that if I repeat it next year I can get a 45 because I know I can do math, it’s just exam stresses that trip me up. :\ I’m really grateful that I took the class a year early and that I have the opportunity to repeat it in the first place though.
Work wasn’t good either. Usually I love my job, but today wasn’t a good day. They put me in miss shop again today which is where I started but I really dislike it in there. Just because it makes me feel terribly, terribly socially awkward and inadequate. I’m quite convinced that everyone else who works in that department hates me. D: and although I only had a tiny three hour shift today, it was super quiet and we had quite a lot of staff in so there was really nothing to do. There wasn’t much clothes to clear out of the fitting room so after I did that there was really nothing to do. The visual merchandisers were in because we have new stock for the new season, so the floor didn’t need any cleaning either and I didn’t want to go to the register cause it wasn’t busy and I felt so out of place there because all the other girls were just talking to each other and I’m far too socially awkward to join into their conversation. I don’t even know why I’m so bad at talking with girls. Like, I’m absolutely fine when I’m working with guys or older women, but around other girls my age/slightly older I just become painfully awkward and shy. I guess that’s why I enjoy working in menswear so much, it’s easily my favourite department. and I don’t mind working in women’s plus sizes either, though it seems to be the department that everyone else notoriously hates;;;
but in addition to me being socially inadequate, there was also this lady today who gave me a dress and asked if we had any in larger sizes. and I told her we didnt cause we only had three of the dresses left since almost all our clothes are on sale at the moment to make room for new stock. But she asked me to check the system to see if we had any in other stores which is something I do all the time and never have a problem with, but I must have mistyped a letter or something in the code cause it came up as sold out across the state. So I told her we didn’t have any left, apologised and explained to her that most other stores must have sold out since we all have sales at the moment and usually my store is the slowest at getting rid of everything. So she said okay and walked off but later she came back to me and was all like ‘excuse me, if you’re not going to do your job properly, don’t do it at all. I brought it to the other counter and they looked it up on their computer and say that chadstone has one and they put it on hold for me. You didn’t even try to looking for me’ and I apologised to her again and said I must have made a mistake with the system but she continued to rant about how I was lazy and didn’t deserve to work here and I felt so terrible about it because I haven’t had a customer upset like that at me since my first day when I didn’t know where the toy department was. but I pretty much started crying when she left and had to hide in the fitting room for awhile to calm down. And then for the rest of the day I was so nervous doing any transactions/trying to help any customers cause I was worried I’d make a mistake by accident again.
Then later the store manager came to buy a clock and asked me to take the price sticker off, and I was picking it but because it was really hot, the top layer was kinda coming off but the bottom was sticking to the plastic cause the glue was melting. And she was all like, “ugh, just leave it on, your nails may be nice to look at but are absolutely useless if you can’t even work with them’ even though my nails don’t make it any harder for me to work at all and getting that stick off would have been even harder if I didn’t have nails. :\ and by then I was really nervous and fumbling everywhere and then I couldn’t find the sticky tape dispenser since its usually under the counter but sometime used it and left it on the register and she was getting really impatient with me. I hope she doesn’t tell the roster manager to cut my shifts because I was so bad at servicing today.
On a brighter note however, one of the ladies who I work with at menswear came and told me that I made the top sales per hour in the whole store yesterday which made me really happy/a little more confident. I was meaning to go check the board in the staff room cause my name would have been on it, but I forgot to. D: I’ll check it tomorrow, I have a long shift tomorrow in menswear which I’m really excited for.
